We've broken up for a month now. I feel better at times, and totally crap at other times. To sum the past month up, I've been out a bit, did things I enjoy, bought some new clothes, got a new hairstyle, and lost a lot of weight, which is a good sign. As of now, I'm 59kg. Not too bad, Chu! My new clothes include a couple of dresses, which of course, includes a gorgeous white strapless, wore that to the party the other day. I actually do feel good about myself. Went back to campus and friends definitely noticed that I'd lost weight. People actually even complimented me on my new look. So I am happy for that.
What I've learnt from this break up is that physical appearance is important. Ideally, it does not last, but it doesn't hurt to look good. HE doesn't think I'm beautiful. But truth be told, I just think he doesn't know how beautiful I am, and how beautiful I may be. It is in the eye of the beholder. HE hasn't seen me in a month, HE has no idea how different I look now, and guess what, he never will, for I really don't think our paths will cross again. It hurts, but it's a reality. How could a love so beautiful end like that? I have to just pick myself up, give God the pieces, so He may fix my broken heart, help me heal and move on with life. HE just doesn't want me anymore, and God give me the wisdom and the strength to accept this and to just let it go, please.
"God, give me grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish one from the other."
I could change to be a better person, for the next person who comes along, whoever that may be. Que Sera Sera, whatever will be will be.
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